Insight.

In my dream world things are always perfect. Everyone I know and care about is at my house, celebrating some kind of major event whether it be a birthday, holiday, or simply just a large party, it's always the same. There are no problems with what we do there, we are free to be ourselves and everyone is having a good time. No one minds to think the police may show up or that my mom or any one of my family members might show up. We party and live until the day is new and even then, some do not quit. Everything is ideal and I can see that I have made my own family among these faces. I would feel empty should any of them not be there and I as I walk around my own house, everything feels new and exciting. Perhaps because it is a party unlike any I've ever had or been to. There is not a care in the world, and everyone is just living simply for the moment at hand. There's singing in the living room, and beer pong in the kitchen. They're smoking bud on the back porch, and outside on the patio they're smoking cigs with a beer in hand. Upstairs, there are people in each room. No one is attempting anything out of the ordinary, just simply talking to one another in whatever state they may be in. That's when I begin to notice not everything is right. I look around and search for something I can never find. It's missing and I don't know where I put it. I scour every location I can think of but still nothing. I try not to alert the others and so they simply carry on with their party. I look around and notice a few faces that are equally loving as they are haunting. I get nervous seeing them but feel almost relieved that they are here too. I move on from these thoughts as I continue to search for whatever it is I began looking for. Eventually I give up, choosing instead to retire to bed as many others have done. I do not sleep in my own room, being as I almost never do, and go to the guest room. There are people sleeping on the small bed by the window so I try to be quiet. I tuck myself in and slowly drift asleep, feeling, but never knowing other people gather into the bed. As soon as I realize the others have all gone to bed and the music has stopped I completely fall asleep. When I wake up in the morning I am shocked at what I find. There is no one in the bed or the room. Likewise when I look around the entire house, there is no sign of a party and no one is anywhere to be found. Distressed I go back upstairs and grab a sweatshirt as I start to feel inredibly cold. I look out the window and see the sun is setting already. I think to myself "This cannot be happening" but I know it is. I stare at the sunset for as long as I can until finally it's my time to shut my eyes.